Baby Boomers U. S. (The Blog)

Monday Musings for Baby Boomers – A Good Hangover

Posted: 18 Oct 2010 03:52 AM PDT

Smile!

Monday has always been a little bit of a let down, what with it being the beginning of the work week and all.

So to start things out on a bright note for the week, I bring you the…

Baby Boomers Monday Musings.

A Good Hangover

Marty wakes up at home with a huge hangover. He forces himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins and a glass of water on the side table. He sits down and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.

Marty looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotless, clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins and notices a note on the table “Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping. Love you.”

So he goes to the kitchen and sure enough there is a hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Marty asks, “Son, what happened last night?”

His son says, “Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and delirious. Broke some furniture, puked in the hallway, and gave yourself a black eye when you stumbled into the door.”

Confused, Marty asks, “So, why is everything in order and so clean, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?”

His son replies, “Oh that! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you said, “Lady, leave me alone, I’m married!”

A self-induced hangover – $100.00

Broken furniture – $200.00

Breakfast – $10.00

Saying the right thing – priceless

Hope that put a little smile on your face and Keep On Smilin’

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Ask the Most Important Questions

Posted: 17 Oct 2010 04:26 AM PDT

Table of contents for Money, Love and Legacy

4 Steps to Avoid the “Race to the Bedside”
Consider “Fair vs. Equal” Inheritance Distribution
Create a Legacy Binder
Tackle the Difficult Conversations
Ask the Most Important Questions

Helga Hayse

Fourth in a Series of Guest Posts by Helga Hayse author of Money Love & Legacy: Conversations That Matter Between Generations (aff). Follow along over the next few weeks for some insight on handling some converstations that most of us usually try to avoid but shouldn't.

Important Questions

Conversations that matter fall into two categories – the practical ones that deal with finances, medical, and planning for end of life preferences. The other kind of conversation, the one that deals with unfinished emotional business, can be a huge burden for a child after a parent dies. It can also be more difficult to navigate.

Here is a list of some of the most important questions you and your parent or child can discuss. The first five relate to specific issues or problems between you. The remainder cover areas that people who love each other want to say while they still can.

What could I have done differently?
How did my choice impact you?
What would you have done in my place?
How would that have changed our relationship?
What do you need from me now to move forward?
Do your parents/children know how much you love them?
What do you most respect and admire about them?
What is the most important thing you want them to know?
What are you most grateful for?
Do you need to ask for forgiveness?

Conversations from the heart can help you clear the emotional hurdles between you and someone you love. If you speak with respect and invite them to say what's in their mind and heart as well, you will be leaving each other a legacy of trust and love.

Don't wait to say these things. A 'race to the bedside' could be too late.

About the author: Helga Hayse educates people on the role that money plays in family relationships. She works with financial and estate planning groups about how to help their clients overcome resistance to planning and conversations between generations.

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